Pounding the streets of Theatreland
- Posted on March 27, 2007 12:31 PM
- 0 comments
Society of London Theatres’ Theatreland Walking Tour
How did you spend your Sunday? Did you nurse a hangover, cook a Sunday roast, indulge in some DIY, take the kids to the park or spend a chunk of the afternoon watching the Hollyoaks omnibus? Chances are, you spent Sunday indoors and didn’t notice the sun shining on London’s upturned face?
In a bid to add a dash of culture to the boiling broth that is my London life, I booked a tour. It wasn’t your average wind-whipped red bus experience and it didn’t involve a headset pumping faceless voices into my ear. It was a West End tour with a difference. We were exploring theatreland – from the outside.
Let’s get this straight, I’m no tourist and since my arrival in London four years ago, I’ve spent a lot of time in the West End’s theatres. I’ve been backstage, on stage, in the comfy and not-so comfy chairs and in dressing rooms aplenty. What I haven’t done (don’t you just love the power of hindsight), is really look at the theatres from the outside. I haven’t read the plaques, researched their founders or even noticed the rotating globe above the Coliseum. It’s not laziness or a lack of interest… just a general habit of watching where I’m going, never looking up above the sea of faces on the street and always, without fail, running late for performances. It’s hard to marvel at a theatre’s entrance when you’re racing the West End clock.
I talked my boyfriend into joining me on the tour. He's a brave man... a theatre-goer but also fond of a Sunday afternoon relaxation session. His biggest worry was that we’d be joining a group of geriatrics as they shuffled down the back streets of London, “oohing” and “aaahing” about London days of old. Sure, we were amongst the youngest there but the mix of culture buffs was varied. A few kids, a lot of middle-aged theatre fanatics, a walking encyclopaedia of a tour guide and not one zimmer-frame. The sun even made an appearance.
So, as we took our marks at the Theatre Royal Drury Lane at 2:30pm, we were prepared for the long haul. Here’s the tour in a nutshell:
2:32pm
The last time I stood before this towering white theatre, I was with my Grandma. We’d guzzled a French pre-theatre meal at one of the small Covent Garden gems and tottered down to see The Producers. Now, the building is sealed shut as the arty people staff creates Middle Earth within. The Lord of The Rings starts here in May… prepare yourself guys; the all singing, all dancing troop of Hobbits is coming. In the background, our guide, Diane Burstein advises us not to run across London’s busy roads. She stresses this point a lot. I can’t help but wonder whether the past involved someone who didn’t look left, right, and then look left again.
2:40pm
As we near the Fortune Theatre, the chilling black posters advertising The Woman in Black rise up above us. Diane talks about the changes in theatre over the years. Did you know acting in theatre used to be regarded as ‘highly’ as upper-class prostitution? Tell that to the A-listers in the West End. The fact that church and the Fortune now share a building says a lot about the shift in attitude. Diane continues to talk… my word that woman can punctuate!
“Watch out for cars!”
We’ve just come across a garden and a group of children playing ball. I can’t see over the raised fences to see them. Oh..? It’s because it used to be a burial ground. A thriller-packed play and a real hidden graveyard all in one block… who knew theatre could be so spooky.
2:50pm
I’m now officially in little lady heaven. Sure, my lad is suffering from hunger pangs (aren’t they always)... but who can complain when you’re meandering through the veins of London's beating heart? Next time you're bustling through town, take a moment to duck down a side street... there are some hidden gems back there (just be sure to dodge the post Saturday night chunder).
We’re at the Royal Opera House now… Diane is full of tales about audiences in the ‘olden days’. People didn’t dress up for the theatre in days gone by… and they used to clap, cheer, throw things and beat drums when they didn’t like a performance. That is, until technology kicked in and there were lights to dim. Wow… riots in the Opera House! Next time I sit in the audience, munching on chocolate covered strawberries, I’ll think back to the innocent fruit throw. All in the name of duty… poor little oranges.
3:20pm
We’re passing the good old Lyceum Theatre now… the ladies beside me chuckle and nod when Diane asks whether they’ve danced there. I’m confused… dancing in the theatre that hosts The Lion King? Yep, it used to be used as a ballroom. Who knows what future theatrical masterpieces will be playing in the cocktail clubs I frequent now. If dancing isn’t your thing, maybe steak-eating is. The Lyceum also used to put a roof over the heads of the “Sublime Society of Beefsteaks". The members met every Saturday night to eat beefsteaks and drink port wine. Tee-totalling vegetarians keep your distance!
3:30pm
We’ve hit The Strand now… The Savoy is our next stop. I won’t go into details (you need a few surprises after all). Diane is like a mine-field of well-rehearsed and deep seated knowledge. If they were involved in London’s West End Theatre history, she knows about them. If there’s a ghost or murder wrapped up in a theatre’s past, she’ll tell you about it, and if you surprise her with a random question, she’ll know the answer. There’s something weird going on that I just can’t put my big toe on. Hang on, my feet don’t hurt! Are we really going at such a steady pace? I also haven’t stopped by a single shop window… am I that engrossed or are we in the midst of some clever ‘distraction avoidance’ tactics?
4:30pm
We’ve passed the winding fronds of Audrey from The Little Shop of Horrors, touched on the porn soaked Avenue Q at the Noel Coward theatre, seen buskers do their thing in Covent Garden’s heaving Square, visited the ‘Actor’s Church’, seen a haunted stage door and explored alleyways I didn’t even know existed. My gallant companion has even forgotten about his hunger pangs. As we finish up outside of the gentleman's club I'll never be able to join, I am glad I’ve filled my Sunday with something other than a hangover. The crowd clap with genuine gratitude for our tour guide and I shake my head as I’m overwhelmed by a sudden passion for the streets around me.
Think about it, have you ever walked through London on a Sunday and really looked at your surroundings? I don’t mean rushing between Embankment tube station and Covent Garden with your nose in a map, or scanning shop windows for the latest bargain. Rather than dodging pigeon ‘packages’ and cursing the walls of slow moving tourists, why not take two hours out of your schedule and learn something?
“Where’s the nearest Waterstones?” I ask my boyfriend. “I want to buy a history book or two”. Now that folks… is a first. I hear Diane also does tours such as ‘Brothels Bishops and the Bard’… now there’s one for the Sunday schedule.
Society of London Theatres’ Theatreland Walking Tour
2007: Sunday 25th March, Sunday 29th April and Sunday 27th May (no tours in December, January or February).
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